Hello, how are you? May this text find you well.

Now that bleak absurdities are out of the way, let’s get to the nut of this entry.

Folks, I have no good habits when it comes to publicizing myself. I am 24 years old and I still am in a constant limbo of facial hair patterns. Under normal circumstances this is nothing to worry about, but I have long been under abnormal circumstances. My professional headshot has been printed and duplicated into a vast number for distribution, but few bookers would recognize the man in that mirror. Below is the headshot I have had printed.

This was accomplished at the beginning of 2010, sometime in January. Below is an image closer displaying my current look.

Please pay fleeting attention to the glossy-eyed stare. We’ve all had those nights, or have we? Is it a sign of something more serious? Is it listed in some medical dictionary as a common symptom of the inability to properly publicize one self? I’ll have to look into this.

For now I have been given some interesting ideas for how to cope with this facial hair dilemma. My girlfriend Tracy suggested my headshot be designed in the style of Wooly Willy (seen here), the old kids toy with the forever adjustable head/face of hair. I just may sink to this level if I do not find a cure for this sickness soon.

Join the campaign to help put an end to “dithering hair syndrome.” Find the cure before nature does it for you (by making you bald like our friend Wooly Willy). I will be selling pamphlets with more information on this after every show.

Enjoy yourself.

-Andrew Burnette